Step 6: Safety aka the 4th of July Step

Happy 4th of July! Or as I like to call it teh British=Pwn3d!!!!11@!!


It's July 4th 2004 and we still haven't been able to come up with a firework that won't blow off a kids arm and thank god for that. I think a missing limb builds character (or a drinking habit) in a young child. At least a kid with one less arm won't join a gang, unless there is a gang of amputees in his/her area. This Step Up!® step is going to be about safety and how it's out of control and unsafe to be too safe. On December 19, 1988 lawn darts were banned in the United States and I have always felt a little empty inside because of this. Any game that involves throwing a large metal spike high into the air is all right by me and I don't care how many people get impelled I want my lawn darts! There is nothing I can think of that would be more enjoyable then to drink two six packs of beer and play lawn darts on a hot summer day while my dog runs around the yard. Now if that an't American I don't know what is. Lawn dart people Step Up!® and make this world a little less safe. On June 9, 1978 the Ford Motor Company recalled 1.5 million Ford Pintos. Why you ask? Because the fuel tank had a design defect, which made the Ford Pinto blow up if someone bumped into it from behind. I think this is an out rage! Not only do I think Ford recalling all of them is wrong but I think all cars should have this "design defect” in them, plus I think it should be added to the front of the car just so some nut job doesn't freak out and try and take out a bunch of people, at most we lose two people and the line at the DMV gets shorter. Just think how polite everyone would be if they know all it took was for someone to bump into them for their car to blow up. Say bye bye to road rage, and you sure as hell better believe people would obey the speed limit. But no! The safety police had to come in and take away what may have been one of the most revolutionary inventions of the 70's. Step Up!® Ford Motor Company you bunch of pussies. And now the 4th of July is back again and there isn't a signal place in the US of A that you can legally blow stuff up and that's pretty sad. We as a nation need to blow things up, it's in are blood, why do you think everyone keeps having heart attacks those are peoples hearts blowing up. Just seeing stuff blow up on TV and on movies isn't enough. if we don't get the right amount of blown up stuff bad things happen ::cough::iraq::cough:: I ‘m not saying that's the only reason why the war over there is going on, but I would like to see what would have happened if m80s where still legal, I bet it would have just been a warning or maybe a forum letter or something. But we will never know! All thanks to some over protective parents and bored old people. So everyone Step Up!® and stop being so safe it's really fucking up our evolution. Now excuse me while I go climb into an old refrigerator insulated with asbestos and play with some mercury

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Step 7: The I sware it wont take a month to write this time step