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I want to be anarchy
Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, Cocksucker, Motherfucker and Tits

Dr. Moonman gives you 5 reasons why you need to Step Up!®
Step Up!® will change your life...no really, I'm not joking!
Step Up!® will make you grow hair in places that matter!
Step Up!® will increase girth but not length!
Step Up!® wont get you a super model girlfriend but it will make you
feel like you can!
Step Up!® is the best part of waking up!
Step Up!® is like having big perky breasts!
Step Up!® is pants optional!
5 and a third
Step Up!® batteries included!
5 and some pie
Step Up!® it's where problems solve you!
5 is alive!
Step Up!® now with 50% more sugar!!!!
Step Up!® ... you can't touch this!
Step Up!® makes fun of dumb people by accident!
5 paragraphB SSc
Step Up!® wont smite you!
5 hole
Step Up!® is like eatting all 31 flavors at baskin robbins at the same time!!!
Step Up!® likes it rough!
Previous Steps

Friday, February 24, 2006

The Return of Step Up....maybe

I fucking hate stuff, and by stuff I mean midgets. They are so fucking weird, I mean really, what the hell is up with midgets? Not a damn things, short bastard.

Okay enough of that madness.

I've had a feeling deep inside me, like something has been missing. What has been missing you ask? Even if you didn't ask this, I don't care. Step Up! That's what, I haven't Stepped Up in months and now my soul is black like the blackest black ever to black the blackest part of black land. I'm talking in the deepest part of the darkest cave in a fucking black hole black!!!! That's fucking black. I've also become a 13 year old emo girl, my parents don't understand me!

But I digress.

What I really have to say is being half Irish sucks when you're poor and like to drink. I wish I could be one of you people, that drink two or three beers and you're totally pissed. But I'm not. I could drink beer all day, and not get drunk, maybe a little tipsy, but that's it. I would also vomit about 50 times because piss actual taste better then most beers, but that's just my opinion. I mean I can and have drank 6 shots of tequila and felt how you earth people feel after 3 beers. This makes me sad. SO! What am I going to do about this? You guessed it, Step the fuck Up! I'm going to drink nothing but home made Stepped Up! alcohol from now on, sure I might go blind because it's going to be 221% proof and I'll have to make a new type of metal that will be able to hold it. But I'm getting pissed like my mates!...how britsh of me.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

I like never link to stuff, cus it's gay.


This is fucking awesome!
With a capital AWWWW and a lower case eSome.


You dig?

Me and my bunion are going to the park, see yah!

Friday, July 22, 2005

Haphazard Hypothesis

I want too send balloons that say "get well soon" to every morgue in the world, because I bet morticians would get a kick out of that.

Somefing Fudged Up...please stand by

Do you like my ankles?...Oh yes I do.

Tuesday, July 12, 2005


Sliquid says: Here at Step Up!® we will disavow any knowledge of your angstions.

The number one cure for anget and anget filled people is Step Up!®


Thursday, May 19, 2005

Step Up! ® The One-Year Anniversary

One year ago today I brought to the world Step Up!® A Psychological revolution.

It was world changing and it changed a lot of worlds. Along with the worlds changing, it also changed a lot of people and rocks and trees and stuff. By this happening everything that Step Up!® touched got ass kicking hobo better! I've been thinking a lot about what the
Anniversary post for Step Up!® should be, and after many sleepless nights (actually I just realized today was the One-Year Anniversary and am making this shit up as I go along) I have come to realizes it's not me that should tell you how Step Up!® made your life better, but you!


I want everyone who has been touched by Step Up!® in a totally awesome way to comment on this here post and tell me how Step Up!® made you or your pet fish a better fing.


Also I swear to dog there better be more then two comments!!!...I don't care if it's spam.

Monday, May 02, 2005

Whats Going To Be Taking Up All Your Unused Brain Cells For the Next Few Weeks?

Well this little news story!

DULUTH, Ga. (AP) - On what was to be her wedding day, Jennifer Wilbanks wore not a white veil but an orange towel over her head to prevent the media from taking her picture. Instead of being led down the aisle by her father, she was led by police to an airplane that flew the runaway bride home.

(thats cool how the reporter is able to compare stuff with other stuff)

Now officials say the 32-year-old woman's cold feet may have gotten her in hot water. On Sunday, Gwinnett County District Attorney Danny Porter vowed to look into whether she violated the law by reporting a crime that didn't exist.

(She looks like a gay ghost in this photo...gay ghost don't exist.

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Wilbanks initially told authorities she was abducted while jogging but later disclosed she took a cross-country bus trip to Albuquerque, N.M., to avoid her lavish, 600-guest wedding.

(Well really who hasn't first started jogging and then ended up on a cross-country bus trip? I know I sure have!)

Porter said Wilbanks could face a misdemeanor charge of false report of a crime or a felony charge of false statements. The misdemeanor carries a penalty of up to a year in jail; five years in prison is the maximum sentence for the felony.

(I hear prison is an awesome way to get out of a lavish, 600-guest wedding)

"If there's criminal responsibility, that's something I have to do something about," Porter said, adding that no decision would be made Sunday. "I think it's really going to depend on the circumstances on how this was done."

(I wish I know what that meant, I would make a really funny comment on it)

Meanwhile Sunday, members of Peachtree Corners Baptist Church, where Mason is a member, said prayers and expressed concern for Wilbanks and her fiance, John Mason, who did not attend services Sunday morning.

(People running away from Baptist? well I never!)

The Rev. Bob Horner thanked church members who had helped in the search for Wilbanks and provided support for family members.

(that last name is mildly ironic, I dig that.)

"Number one, we are so thankful that Jennifer has been found," Horner told the congregation. "Number two, I want to publicly thank all of you who prayed and you who went to Duluth to be with the family."

(Number three, Jennifer is going to burn in hell fire for all eternity for being a liar and a tramp! Amen.)

An FBI spokesman said Saturday that Wilbanks apparently made a sudden decision to flee her looming wedding and did not realize hundreds of people were looking for her. But he also noted she cut her hair to avoid being recognized.

(I really don't think just cutting her hair would have done the trick)

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Porter said he would speak on Monday to police in Albuquerque, where Wilbanks turned up late Friday and called her fiance and 911 to report that she had been kidnapped.

(Worst fibber ever!)

Despite angry calls from some residents, authorities in Albuquerque said they had no plans to charge Wilbanks, though they haven't ruled out the possibility.
"We don't have to charge everybody," said Albuquerque police spokeswoman Trish Ahrensfield. "We have discretion. We are human beings. We have feelings and we are professional at the same time."

By all accounts, authorities in Albuquerque befriended the woman.

(Well yeah, they got one look at the husband and took pity on this nut job of a woman)

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Wilbanks boarded her plane wearing a new FBI hat, blazer, polo shirt and pants and carrying a new tote bag and teddy bear, a gift from the aviation police chief. She flew first-class and said she planned to name the bear "Al," for Albuquerque.

(Damn if I know you get all kinds of wonderful parting gifts when you fake your own kidnapping I would do it too! Also this woman is 32 year's old and is still naming stuffed animals! She should be put in prison for that reason alone)

"Law enforcement is really making a major move to deal with people in crisis," Albuquerque Police Chief Ray Schulz said Sunday. "Miss Wilbanks was definitely a person in crisis."

(thats awesome how the police of Albuquerque are Stepping Up!® and like helping people in crisis. I mean thats so un-police like ain't it?)

But the Gwinnett County district attorney noted that vast law-enforcement resources were used to look for the missing bride.

After she disappeared last week without her keys, wallet or diamond ring, more than 100 officers led a search that involved several hundred volunteers, including many wedding guests and members of the bridal party.

(Well the wedding guests and bridal party shouldn't be bitching, I'm pretty sure thats part of the deal if you're invited to a wedding. Bride go's missing, you have to help look or you get no cake.)

Porter said he had no jurisdiction over the woman's initial 911 call in Albuquerque, in which she told an operator she was kidnapped by a man and a woman in their 40s who were driving a blue van. Through sobs, she told the dispatcher they had a small handgun.

("small handgun" hahaha thats totally a jab at the dudes penis size)

But Porter said Wilbanks could be charged for reporting her kidnapping story over the phone to Duluth Police Chief Randy Belcher.

(OH DAMN! not old police chief Randy "I don't like fakers" Belcher!!! AHHH!)

Last year, a Wisconsin college student who faked her own abduction and turned up curled in a fetal position in a marsh was given three years' probation for obstructing police and was ordered to repay police at least $9,000 for their search.

(Damn those crazy Wisconsin college student all hopped up on cheese)

Well...thats it folks!
The totally useless news story thats going to be used to distract everyone from the fact that 11664 people have died in Iraq since the start of the oil monopolization!...uh I mean war.

What do you have to say about this Al the Bear?

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This is where I got the story from so I don't like piss them off CLICK ME


Monday, April 18, 2005

Honoring Greatness Step Up!® Style: Ashlee Simpson

Ashlee Simpson, one of the most pure souls on this planet made a mistake; well really her parents made the mistake.

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Ashlee Simpson was tricked! Yes that's better. She was tricked into thinking she had talent. Driven both by her parents and her blind insanity to live up to her almost god like sister Jessica Simpson.

Who by law has to wear a helmet at least 75% of everyday.


Now this type of pressure would kill most normal people, but because Ashlee is such an unbelievable person and personal friends with baby Jesus, she is able to grin & bare it.

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If only we all could learn from Ashlee and her greatness. Maybe the world would truly be a better place
just like that song by Ashlee intitled
"Love Make The World Go Around".

Nothing more true has ever been said.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Ashlee Simpson we salute yee!

I haven't posted anything in so long!

I've been thinking and one of the reasons I haven't posted in so long is I have painted myself into a box. The style I think I have to write in to post is at times really fucking annoying; I mean a man can only figure so many ways of saying Step Up!® in a given opinion.

So what is the Doctor going to do you ask...ask this now, it will be better if you actually say it outloud so as at least one other person hears you.

Well the Doctor is going to mix things up, he's going to be a little wild and try something new. I'm going to post anything and everything and anyway I feel like at the moment. Now this maybe for a little while or a big while, but thats what I'm doing. So pretty much this is going to be like any other annoying blog for the time being. But really with the power of Step Up!® can anything be like any other annoying thing, and if it is it's annoying to a whole new level, there by making it awesome again.

Hooray for the power of the Step Up!®

Now this doesn't mean I'm not doing steps anymore. I just want to bring some life back to this bitch, and I think this is the best way to do it.

Now because it's been so long here's a dumb prank phone call I did, take note of the awesome redneck accent

More to come...hee hee come
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Founder of
Step Up!®
Dr. Moonman
For just pennies a day
You can help keep the Step Up!® institute clothed and fed!
click to donate
Hear from people who Step Up!®

"I used to hang around the bottom layer of hell, chomping on Judas Iscariot - who never showered btw, but now that I've Stepped Up!®, I'm cavorting with adulterers and theives. Thanks Dr. Moonman, you're my saviour."



"...I am strangely attracted to ... you ... will call ... now."



"I'm just a baby and can't even walk yet, but I've Stepped Up!®"

-a baby

Learn more about the Founder of
Step Up!®
Dr. Moonman
Co-founder of the
Step Up!® institute
Prof. Kitten mistress of the night!
Manager of Marketing and big lunch bills at the
Step Up!® institute
Prof. Bomberella stylist and and word master!
People who have
Stepped Up!®
People who need too
Step Up!®
Sites that have
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People who will never
Step Up!®
Aunt Beatrice's Ice Cream
It's one hell of a Stepped Up!® forum